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Personal Thoughts

April 26, 2013

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Man, child abuse can be such a harsh and heart breaking topic to cover.  This is my mother, 4 of her siblings, and her parents. I’ve heard all kids of stories growing up.  My mother, 3 of her full brothers, and her younger sister were all abused by their drunken father.  My mom said he was also a child pornographer.  He didn’t take the pictures, how ever, he did look at them, had people send them to him, etc.  I only met him once.. On my mom’s 30th birthday. I don’t really remember it.  I just remember him picking me up and holding me.  Being only 5 or so at the time, I had no idea what he had done to the family.  My grandma (my mom’s mother) is 100% Mexican.  She lived in Leon, Guanjuato, Mexico, married, and had 4 kids there.  Her husband got hit by a drunk driver and died.. She ended up leaving her 4 kids (my moms 3 older half brothers and half sister) in Mexico to stay with their grandma, as she left to the United States to try and earn some money for her family. She ended up meeting Bill, my mom’s father, and got pregnant.  She returned back to Mexico, and had her 5th child, a boy, named William.  She soon returned back to the U.S., got married to Bill, got pregnant again, with my mom, then had 3 more children.  When my grandma came to the U.S. she didn’t speak much English, she didn’t know the U.S. laws, etc.  So as Bill threatened her, after he abused them, she was scared to ever call the cops, or file in a report.  She didn’t know the laws, she thought she would lose all of her children.. My uncle went on his dad’s computer one night, and discovered some horrific pictures.. He saw multiple children naked.  He then realized who his father truly was.  The youngest child he saw was a drugged 5 year old girl.  Her eyes were rolled back.  He immediately confronted his dad, and told him that he should go to rehab or he will never ever talk to him again.  Bill however, denied everything.  So my uncle, never talked to him again.  Not till we all flew down to Oklahoma, in July 2011, to say good bye to him, when he was on his death bed.  They all forgave him, only to start a new chapter in their lives. My mother got custody of her younger sister when my mom was 18 and my aunt was 16.  They moved to Minnesota, and my mom moved in with her boyfriend at the time (my father) who was living with his parents, 20 yrs old and just got out of the army with my moms older brother William. My grandma also left, to stay with William. When Bill was at work one day, he came home, and his wife was gone, not a note left, nothing. However, poor Jimmy, the youngest child was left alone, with his dad as everyone moved out.  Bill haunted Jimmy.  Jimmy is still mentally unstable from his fathers behavior.  Bill would call Jimmy’s girlfriends, and try to flirt with them.  He also beat Jimmy, and scared the living hell out of him.  He was 11 years younger than William… Jimmy never talked to Bill again after he turned 18.  He never went to his funeral either.  My uncle, James, messaged everyone of us in the family that he doesn’t want anything to do with the family because no one was there for him.  It broke my heart, because I know if I would have been around, or was his sister, instead of his niece, I would’ve helped him… He has recently gotten re-married, and I’ve talked to his wife who is pregnant, on Facebook.. I finally have convinced her to get Jimmy and their kids to come to my older sisters graduation party, thus being a reuniting event for the family, because no one in the family has seen him for about 15 years..  I’m so thankful for her, she probably doesn’t realize how close she is bringing the family together..  I want my uncle to know that his sibling has started a new chapter after their fathers lives, as he was not there for his funeral, so I want him to know that we will be there for him, from now on.  We are like a support system for each other.  My aunt now has M.S. and has hallucinated and was even put in an insane asylum after her fathers death.  She still happens to be my inspiration till this day however. As you can see, Child Abuse is no joke.  It impacts EVERYONE.  Please take action now, and help end the violent abuse not just among children, but around everyone.

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